everything in time or The Chaotician

today

better prepared

for tomorrow

than yesterday I was

for today

because yesterday

for today

there had been an expectation

of something

which, in the end, threw everything;

 

now, today,

expecting tomorrow,

I do not expect something

nor do I expect nothing

but I expect that

even this expectation of neither

will be wrong

and yet somehow also right

but in such a way that it will have been wrong, nevertheless

and even then, on top of that and/or below it,

third-order,

such being-wrong-about-being-right-about-being-wrong

also being

not quite right nor quite wrong either

and so on

to fourth order

and fifth

and on

and on

until the day has gone and what it actually was will have been

which probably not much more than the affected expectation of a tomorrow ever postponed by its being expected per se

and probably a lot more than that, too

probably in such particular amounts of right and wrong that it and us will never quite be settled

and so that, for us, tomorrow, which must be expected, always expected, is still, in-the-making, on its way to us,

as we, same-way, on our way to it via an errant program of expectations

it being, at last in part, the remaking of those expectations about itself

guaranteeing that tomorrow will ever be in such a way that it will never be –

that is,

the total connectedness of the disjointure;

 

indeed, it now seems to me, this neither and both stands a much better preparation

for tomorrow

than yesterday’s had been

for today

having been thrown off by the unexpected problem

of expecting the problem of expectation per se.

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